To model the role of LISTENER for our teens we need to be able to:
Look at our teens when they are talking to us. Please note that this does not mean that they need to look us in the eye. Looking another person in the eye is an extremely 
intimate form of communication. This can be very uncomfortable for teens (especially males).
Involve our self in what our teen is saying. Put aside what we are doing for the moment.
See that internal and external distractions are at a minimum.
Take Time to Give Time
Research has demonstrated that most people think at about 600 words per minute or greater but speak at only about 150 to 200 words per minute. Giving them the time they need lets them know that what they have to say is important to us.
Empathize with our teens. Look at the conversation from their point of view.
Non verbal messages (body language) from our teens and us play a vital role in listening. We communicate non verbally through facial expressions, eye contact, body movements, posture, gestures, touch, space, energy level, and tone of voice.
Echo to our teens, in our own words, helps to make sure that we understand what they have said and the emotions around what they have said. If there is any misunderstanding our teens can correct and clarify with additional information.
Respond to what our teens have said with feedback appropriate to the situation. Feedback could simply be a smile, a pat on the back, some sage advice, keys to the car…
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